AMA and Health Care = IME Rules and Stools
GEICO has a Gecko, Met Life has Snoopy and my insurance has a Stool Pigeon. Health Care and insurance can be amusing.
I’m recovering from injuries sustained in a car accident. Today, I was sent to Quest Laboratories to get a stool specimen. I’m not real sure what this test has to do with my wrist and neck injuries, but you know the insurance and medical procedures inspire curiosity. It’s just the Rules of Stools and we must cooperate.
What I was given was some colorful little containers to take home, with instructions in TEN languages. Some of them are jokes and puzzles. For example, “the vial with the White Cap is to be refrigerated.” The caps are blue, orange, and pink. I am an artist, and I know my colors. I checked some of the other languages: blanca in Spanish, blanco in Italian. White.White. White. I couldn’t read the Cambodian, German, Japanese, Chinese, or Vietnamese and I don’t even know what Laotian is.
I decided to Google stool. Aha! Stool Pigeon: “A decoy bird, or a police informer.” Just WHAT is the purpose of the IME (Independent Medical Exams)?
I love Google. Here’s what I found:
Here’s a humorous post I found by Chas at BangItOut.com entitled:
AMA and Health Care
Health Care and so many of our concerns are like caterpillars who cannot fly. . . . . Yet! © Vivian Greene. All rights reserved.
The American Medical Association has weighed in on Obama’s health care package.
The Allergists were in favor of scratching it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.
The Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but the Neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve.
Meanwhile, Obstetricians felt certain everyone was laboring under a misconception, while the Ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted.
Pathologists yelled, “Over my dead body!”. while the Pediatricians said, “Oh, grow up!”
The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while the Radiologists could see right through it.
Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing and the Internists claimed it would indeed be a bitter pill to swallow.
The Plastic Surgeons opined that this proposal would “put a whole new face on the matter.” The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea.
Anesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas, and those softy Cardiologists didn’t have the heart to say no.
In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the tushies* in Washington.
* Forgive me, Chas, I took the liberty of changing that one naughty word.
AMA and Health Care = IME Rules and Stools
Vivian Greene
Invest In Love inc
“All that is real is seen with the heart.”
© 2009 – 2011, Vivian Greene. All rights reserved.
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